Here we go....

Wow, okay so I've never done a blog before, and I always swore I wouldn't be one of "those people" who blog about their lives for all to see....but here I am.  I've been feeling lately like this would be good for me to do, to get some of my feelings out there and just to put some of my life down on paper and really to create a "family journal" so to speak.  I think that some of my thoughts and feelings could be shared by others as well and I think this is something we will really enjoy reading together as a family as time goes on, and that my boys can read and pass on throughout the years!  One of my closest and dearest friends has her blog and she told me that she uses hers as a sort of journal, and then prints it off and binds it at the end of every year so she has it.  Since I no longer keep a journal, I think that is something I should be doing too.  I figure I'm on the computer all the time, and never seem to have time to physically write in a journal every day, so here's a logical solution right?  So if my blog seems a little messy sometimes, sorry that's life right?

So I'm feeling some stress this morning already.  I found out yesterday that my mom, who is truly my best friend in the whole world besides my wonderful husband of course, has been having trouble swallowing.  Of course my sister, my other best friend, and I go into panic mode and start berating her for not having called a doctor sooner.  We finally scare her into making an appointment for first thing this morning.  My mom is not a worrier at all, especially because she's never sick, and is a pretty positive person when it comes to her health.  However, we really scared her and she was a little upset with us I think for pointing out some of the issues.  I'm usually not as concerned as I am at this point.  I was sick about this all night!!  I've been praying nonstop since I found out she made an appointment, and I have such a sick feeling in my stomach I can't think about anything else.  Kris, my wonderful hubby, says I'm "writing the story before it happens", which, let's face it, I do all the time.  I can't help it though.  I'm a worrier and a glass is half empty kind of person most of the time, so it comes with the territory.  Her appointment is this morning, and I'm on pins and needles counting down the hours until she calls me from the car and says it's just her allergies or something else that isn't serious.  


Thinking about all this, all night long because I slept for maybe two and a half hours, has made me really think hard about my mom and my relationship with her.  I just want to say how much I love my mom.  Her life has not been an easy one.  She's had so many hardships in her life, and she has managed to come through fighting, and still manages to be a warm, caring woman, not to mention the best mother in the entire world.  She is my rock, really and truly.  She has always been there for me no matter what, and we've gone through our share of issues as well.  I can only hope to be a mom like her, and I strive to reach that goal daily but don't even come close.  I'm not saying this because I think something is going to happen to her, but more like I need to remember that more often, and tell her too.  I am who I am because of her, and I attribute a lot of my good qualities to her being who she is!!  I love you so much mom!!!  You are an amazing wife, mother, and grandmother!!!!  Thank you for being who you are.